Definitely not what it used to look like. Sometimes I still am scared of Fridays: feeling antsy, the dread of knowing everyone is having fun out and I don’t have plans - but I discovered that indulging myself can look somewhat different, making plans to try new stuff, being spontaneous in safe places that I didn’t use to hang out at and sometimes just sitting with an uncomfortable feeling at my house (but trying to focus on the fact that I’m safe here).